Girl with thoughts, beware.

Think. Write. Repeat.

I will never be a wood worker…. and other musings to close 2014.

Wow… I had this as a draft and never published. What a way to start 2015!



The other day I listened to a podcast featuring an old interview with Nick Offerman (of Parks and Recreation fame). Turns out Nick is a part-time wood worker. He owns his own wood shop and has crafted furniture and canoes for a long time, often supplementing his acting career before he made it big.

Needless to say, I was inspired. How great is that, I thought? Hey, maybe I can get into woodcarving. Or woodcutting. Or whatever you call it…. Hey, maybe I can intern there?! I can discover a life-long passion for working with wood!

I have never worked with wood. I don’t think it’s even entered into my consciousness before that I would ever want to carve a chair. But somehow, Nick Offerman’s having a unique skill that provided him with a living in the down years spoke to me. I needed that kind of passion.

I looked on his website. He has a whole list of FAQs on what his woodshop is and isn’t. A) He’s not going to give anyone a job B) A really cool hand carved desk costs $4,800 C) You can take woodcutting lessons at Off the Saw in downtown LA.

I went to that website. I looked at the $200 plus wood cutting package (all supplies included) that will teach you the basics of woodcarving/cutting, and at the end you get to walk away with your own hand carved cutting board!

And that’s when I realized I would never, EVER be a wood worker. No matter how inspired I am about someone else’s success and journey, it’s not mine. Nor should it be.

What I mean to say is, I found myself near the end of 2014 grasping at straws.

This hasn’t been the best year of my life, though I’ve got plenty going for me. It’s been a frustrating year, emotionally and professionally. A year of little surprises and big disappointments. I have to admit I spent 2014 mostly confused. I lost myself and the best part of me somewhere during the year.

I’ve got to get her back in 2015.

I do want to share a few people who have rocked my world with some of their postings:

Megan Stroup, “A Semi-Charmed Kind of Life” took an amazing journey this year and her blog gets better and better with each post.

James Altucher has some incredible insight and writes frank and revealing stuff.

I’m really digging Chris Guillebeau‘s mission. He mostly writes for the traveler, but we are all travelers in some fashion aren’t we?

I’m sorry for not posting more blog posts this year, and I’m even more sorry that I wasn’t able to read more blogs written by some very talented people. This is a year where I feel like I let down my friends.

But I am hopeful for 2015. One of the things I can’t fault with this year is my growing relationship with my husband. I love him. I want to love him more.

Chris Guillebeau writes a great Year End Review. Here is my brief submission:

What went well in 2014?:

  • Started my new job. Got a raise! Reached some professional goals and realized a few new strengths.
  • My first year of marriage did not end in tears. Realized that I love being married.
  • I’m about to pay off my student loan. Financially, this was a great year for me.
  • Joined a writers group. I found a bunch of supportive and amazing writers and it feels like home.
  • Broke through some of my acting blocks. Found my voice!
  • Got to spend time with my family. We have a much better relationship now than ever.
  • Went 2 months without any sugar. Lost 3 pounds and slept better.
  • Started working with a trainer and getting in better shape. Actually RAN not walked a 5K.
  • Began to learn German. Abandoned it for now, but I started!
  • Got to work on the Rejane Project again and the show was a success!
  • Read 49 (and possibly 50 before Thursday) out of my projected 45 books for the year!

What didn’t go well in 2014?

  • Fear went haywire this year. I received some negative feedback and I personalized it. It’s haunted me for about 6 months.
  • A lot of past karma came back my way this year… I have to work on my professional relationships.
  • I don’t think I was the best friend I could be this year. I didn’t have the emotional capacity or time to spend with many friends.
  • Our wedding year in 2013 and new job meant less time for travel.
  • My French has suffered greatly. I’m not able to keep up much practice.
  • There are many things I wanted to accomplish by the end of the year: Finish my wedding album, get new headshots, publish a few of my essays, revamp my blog… I didn’t get to them. I feel let down.
  • I didn’t get to participate in as many Buddhist activities with my group as I had wanted to.

Goals for 2015:

  • Looking over my past year, I see that I’ve got quite a bit going on. I need to simplify. Can the headshots wait and perhaps I spend some more time with friends? Maybe I need to stop worrying, let the laundry sit for a while, and spend that time more wisely.
  • I need to work on being a better friend and wife.
  • Have fun. Don’t think I made room for that in 2014.
  • Travel for pleasure.
  • Stop saying “You have to do this or that”. Everything is a choice.
  • Love myself more.
  • Forgive myself  a lot.
  • Stop waiting for permission… just do it already!
  • Love where I am in this moment. I’m on a journey, and I need to stop living like I’ve already parked it somewhere.
  • Write. And write some more. Maybe submit for publication!
  • Get better at goal-setting. (seriously, though, I’ve never been good at goals).
  • “This is the year I…” Every year I’ve said this. 2015 is TBD!

Thanks to everyone who read my posts this year. It’s an honor to have an audience of readers who love books as much as I do. More to come.



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